B*ll*cks to the Bucket List

There are some fabulous travel websites around, full of inspiring photos and top tips. Almost all have at least one Bucket List of destinations that you “must see” before you die/retire/lose your marbles and your passport.

They make great reading, if a little wistful for us, as some of them are just so damn aspirational.

10 luxury hideaways with hot and cold running champagne?

Unaffordable

Hike Machu Picchu, zip wire in Costa Rica or trek the Andes?

Don’t have the energy.

In fairness, I have to point out that here Pork Belly grunted “speak for yourself” so the above comments are my personal viewpoint and not shared by anyone else in this establishment!

There’s something unsettling about these bucket lists, and not just because they can make you feel a little inadequate.

There’s an undercurrent that says there are things you MUST do, places you MUST see, experiences you MUST have that underpin even the most laid-back and freewheeling of travellers.

Machu Picchu Peru
© skeeze Pixabay

Perhaps it’s a side effect of growing older, but we refuse to buy in to that.

We hope we have at least another 10 years of adventuring ahead but, as Pork Belly often remarks, we’ve eaten more hot dinners than we have left to eat.

And that is, in a strange way, very liberating.

We don’t have the time, energy or inclination to count how many countries we’ve been to across how many continents.

Trip planning 3 pins in a map © Shawn Harquail Photography, Flickr
© Shawn Harquail Photography, Flickr (cc by-nc 2.0)

Life is not a competition

Travel should not be about pins in the map and a to-do list. Because everyone can find a little adventure if they take what’s offered and run with it.

I once attended a management training course. After a weekend of fun and challenging tests, we were invited to spend Sunday morning quietly reflecting on our own careers and illustrating them in pictorial form.

All around me industrious folk were drawing racetracks, archery targets and even one beautiful golf course. They all had some aim and purpose, albeit one that might prove elusive or tough to reach.

Mine was an old-fashioned bagatelle board. Just pull back the plunger, let fly with the little ball bearing and bounce your way from buffer to buffer, sometimes ringing the jackpot and at other times slipping and sliding down the “no score” gulley, only to be fired off again.

And ever since Pork Belly and I hooked up, it’s been the same with travelling.

We’ve never had a bucket list, just a willingness to go where opportunity takes us. It’s that randomness that has led to the most memorable adventures in the last 30 + years.

Random travel experiences

My horrendous map reading skills have led to some wonderful adventures in France.

I once got us stranded us in a tiny village called Pontlevoy where the whole place was ‘en fête’ for the grape harvest.

The locals were baffled to see two English folk joining in so happily, but welcomed us with a nod and a shrug.

Village dignatories - Pontlevoy grape festival France 1983
Grape picking tableau - Pontlevoy France 1983

The Bucket List

And in France we found that off the beaten track wine tasting in local vineyards, is so much more fun than escorted tours.

Winetasting in France

New Zealand adventure

While hitchhiking in New Zealand, a driver gave us a lift and talked so affectionately of his home town, Karamea, that we made a diversion.

Here we met a genuine possum trapper who went by the name of ‘Halfoot’ Simpson and got a personal guided tour of the local caves.

Out of season, everything was closed, but the locals opened up rooms and cafés just for us.

'Half Foot' Simpson and horses Karamea New Zealand 1988
‘Half Foot’ Simpson and horses Karamea New Zealand 1988

Personalised bus tour of Singapore

Waiting for a bus in Singapore to the Jurong Bird Park, a driver drew up and asked us where we were headed.

He said he’d take us there, even though it wasn’t on his route.

There then followed a personal tour of the city’s landmarks as the driver shared his pride in his home, finally depositing us – by then his only passengers – right outside the gates of the park.

Helping out at Jurong Bird Park - Singapore 1988

Listen to the locals

A tip from a local shopkeeper led us to bypass the luxury boat trips from Elounda to Spinalonga in Crete.

Instead, we took his advice and boarded the first ferry of the day from Plaka to the island, commuting with the ticket office staff and guides.

That gave us an hour of almost totally deserted island before the rest of the trippers arrived.

Local ferry boat to Spinalonga, Plaka, Crete

Spinalonga, island of ghosts

Adventures on your own doorstep

Then there was the time I suddenly realised how much we take our home city for granted and started exploring it like tourists instead.

That’s why, for the first time in 24 years, we braved the cold and wet and took part in the annual Burning of The Clocks Ceremony to mark the winter solstice.

Burning of the Clocks 21st December - Brighton UK

So have you ended up somewhere unusual because of a random approach to travelling?

Here’s to the bagatelle board style of travelling and saying b*ll*cks to the bucket list!


Where to next?
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The very best of Exmoor
8 quirky places to visit in the UK

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